The Knitting Fiend

Yes, today’s carnival is about the venerated custom that results in blog titles like:“Knitblogging III – Christmas is a’coming and there’s yarn in the air,” and “Christmas Knitting,” (which begins,”Saturday was horrible.”)

And which spawns posts like: “Slightly Frantic Christmas Knitting”.

And later hatches posts like: “Christmas Knitting Finished!!!”, or more enthusiastically, “Drumroll Please”, “Christmas Knitting Finished!”

Yes, holiday knitting is merry! Usually.

But alas, the season also result in titles like: “Unfinished Objects 2005″ or “Christmas Knitting” which begin, “Well, I didn’t finish all the Christmas knitting that I wanted to.”

Sigh. . . Let’s not think about that!

Many knitters do finish their Christmas knitting and with panache. Elaine, unable to find a cute doll, knit her grandaughter a baby doll, which she revealed at her blog just before Christmas! (If you like adorable, click to see it. Plus, she finished even more stuff!)

Seeing the zillions of things she and others finished, I am green with envy. Worse, I realize I’m a knit-slacker. Did I knit a special doll? Mittens, socks, hats? Whatever might be perfect for a friend or relative?

No. Instead, I surf blogs and discover, sitting in her home not 30 miles from me, knitgirl, a practically brand new knitter who knit tons of scarves, observing, “The best way to beat the cold Chicago winter is a warm fluffy scarf. “

Yes, a nearly newbie definitely outdid me! (Since I feel outdone, I’ll quibble and observe, that a scarf is a good way to beat the Chicago cold. But it’s not the best way. To achieve “the best” you need to add Swedish meatballs and Aqua Vit! But, I wouldn’t doubt knitgirl ate and sipped something warm while knitting those scarves. )

Yes, I could imitate Elaine or Knitgirl, but I don’t. Maybe I’m worse than a slacker; maybe I’m just one of the “Knitting Humbugs”?

I can’t help but feel a bit of shame at the thought. . . But this thought brings me some cheer:

At least I’m not the only one!

Knitting Humbugs are everywhere and post titles like: “My Solution to Christmas Knitting”, “Freed From Christmas Knitting.”

Yep! We Knit-Scrooges have found a way to avoid the whole festive knitting scene! And even non-Scrooges understand what, or, more precisely, who, causes knitting humbuggery rise up at Holiday time. It’s the ghost of Erika’s Great Aunt!”

Erika reminds us of the misery caused by holiday knitting gone bad:

Our family has a long history of Bad Knit Gifts. I had a great aunt (my grandmother’s sister-in-law – that’s a great aunt, right? Oh, who knows) who, for reasons unknown, one year knit up a huge batch of the ugliest hats in the world.

I can’t help but shudder when I read that because a similar ghost chained to unknit balls of yarn and double pointed needles haunts me in my dreams. To avoid walking the earth as “Erika’s Great Aunt”, (I) always resolve to avoid holiday knitting, but in the the end, I can’t quite do it. I knit one sweater, and finished it just in time to put it under the tree.

When I finished, I poured my self some eggnog, and visited Karen’s blog. There, I saw A Christmas Cat worthy of Freya’s sleigh and enjoyed knitting poetry, which began:

Karen the Holiday Knitter
Took some time to write some prose
And if you saw her knitting
You would even say it grows.

Luckily, it looks like Karen finished her poem and her knitting. I know the rest of you finished too.

Now, let’s all go plan our projects for the New Year! and wish you all Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year!
You would even say it grows.