The Knitting Fiend

I know many of you probably don’t read “Dear Cheryl” in the Chicago Tribune, but today’s article described bad dates. As usual, the people Cheryl interviewed did not follow proper etiquette during this date.

I, Lucia, want to educate the public on proper etiquette during bad dates. Let me begin by using Jasmine’s bad date; she describes it thusly:

“…….I met him at a restaurant and he bought me a drink. Not once did he ask me if I wanted any food!

“Then, he spent some quality time complaining about his ex-wife. We discovered that we knew a woman in common. He mentioned that his friend had wanted to fix him up with her. He proceeded to ask me if she was still single. It was clear he considered her a potential date! At that point, I couldn’t leave fast enough!”

Get up and leave? Such bad manners. You can’t just walk out on your date!

Here’s what you should do if this happens to you:

When it becames clear your date is trying to figure out if another woman would date him, suddenly brighten up. Act really excited and blurt out,

“I have an idea; let me give her a call!”

Pick up cell phone; dial. Say,

“Sally, I’m on a first date with ‘guy’. We’ve been sitting here in a restaurant for an hour and haven’t ordered any food. He’s been complaining about his ex-wife, then, he mentioned you. When he realized I knew you, he asked me whether or not you might consider dating him. So, I thought I’d ask.

Would you consider stopping by and filling in for the second half of this date?”

Now, you may stand up, say “Gotta go”, and leave.